A few weeks ago my lovely fiance wrote a sweet and friendly blog in which she stated her reasons for loving me. (probably because of the many concerned people who keep asking her why she would say yes to me) I thought it was so cute and very reasonable! But there was something that was posted by Ty that I would like to quote from and then reply to. Ty said...
"Maybe we should start to have most annoying couple contests. I nominate Drew and Kristen as the reigning champions!"
Although the reasons for making such a statement were never specified, I wish to respond to it in a kind and gracious manner so as to not annoy or offend any of the parties to be mentioned... And by the way Ty you are wrong, you are dead wrong!! So I am going to make my list of the most annoying couples in the family and I will state a least one supporting reason for why.
I should also mention one other well researched and documented scientific fact, and that is that annoyingness is inherently a male trait. It is noted that a female can begin to take upon themselves some of the "annoyingness" characteristics displayed by her male counterpart, but this would only be an offshoot of him and would not be of her own making. Therefore a female is innocent of any kind of annoyingness and should not be held accountable for her male partners faults. (Ty you better lay off dude cause your stepping on thin ice) So although I will be mentioning couples to meet the demands of Ty's "most annoying couple contest", the "annoyingness traits" that I will associate with the couple will only be directed at the male.
I would like to start at the least annoying and work my way to the grand champion.
#7- I think there will be little argument on Drew and Kristen being the least annoying. Both are sweet and kind to all and despise confrontation. A person would be hard pressed to find anything annoying with these two angels.
#6- This may be biased because of the help that they gave to me yesterday on a project for school, but with their musical talents and cute little boy, very little can be said about their annoyingess. It is noted that Jeff has had sputs like "man thats the bomb" shortly after his mission and "of course" but those faults seem to have been smoothed out by his near perfect companion Angie. Cal is doing a lot of good as well.
#5- Although accustomed to a rant here or a rave there, Matt and Wendi seem to have found a balance that makes Matt much more bearable. But with that said, it is also important to note that Matt's outbursts are usually justified and well supported, but nevertheless still quite annoying. Thank you Wendi for moving him down the list.
#4- Mark and Liz are one of the greatest couples that I know, but Mark just doesn't seem to want to go any lower on this list. I have noticed a new degree of annoyingness that wasn't noticed before in Mark and that is what I refer to the "G.O.A.T. disease". If you are not sure what that stands for just read his blogs and posts or go to the fantasy football league and you will find it there. Also, it is so annoying seeing the Worland Warriors at the top of the league. There can only be one G.O.A.T. Mark, and it sure ain't you.
#3- He may not be married but Adam comes in as strong a canidate as I've seen in a while with his cereal eating and nose itching ways. If you have never experienced it then just eat a bowl of Honey Nut Cherrios next to him and you will know what I mean. Enough said.
#2- This was a hard call. #1 and #2 were so close but because of the addition of Dana while I was away, Ty and Dana now occupy the #2 spot. This annoyingness is almost allusive at times. It is hard for me to put a finger on it, but I know that it is there. Just the very fact that I had to write this blog is a testament to the reality of it.
#1- Even with the help of his wonderful wife (who I might add is perfect in every way), this man seems to be off the charts of measured annoyingness. From his fake injuries ("oh my back"), to his playing the role of a martyr ("what am I, chopped liver"), all the way to his depressing outlook on life ("We are in a world or hurt") dad seems to top the chart in every category possible. He may be a good man, which nobody is disputing, but he is one heck of an annoying good man.
There you have it. Megan would be right up there in the mix but I decided to leave her off the list. In fact she might be able to take it all, but she is not yet looking to become a couple so that disqaulifies her from joining the "most annoying couple contest" like Adam did. I hope that everyone will look at this and realize how undeserving my beautiful fiance and I are of the title "the most annoying couple" and I also hope that each of us will take time to congratulate the now reigning champion. Way to go Dad, you've worked hard for it. You really do deserve it. My hats off to you.
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5 comments:
Drew- I have never seen such a complete list of rankings of annoyingness. It was a very thorough list and very thought out. Thank you
I would normally not even respond to such poppycock as Goose has espoused on his latest Blog. It is completely illogical to, on the one hand, vote Margaret and I as the most annoying couple and then exempt her from the vote. It then becomes the most annoying person.....not the most annoying couple. Therefore, Goose's entire Blog is the work of a buffoon.
I chose to not get involved in the fray, except to say that the most annoying couple doesn't reside in either Wyoming, Arizona, Colorado or Utah. However the Utah couple that is soon to be ranks #2. I leave it up to your imagination as to who wins my vote. This is based on several factors that I will detail upon request. I also would like to note that as soon as one Utah couple comes on board they could very, very well rise to #1.....it wouldn't take that much effort on thier part since they are so close as individuals.
I mean how can two individuals who rank so high on the annoyedness scale by themselves, not rank extremely high when they come together. Simple math says they will soon rise to the top, much as cream does.
End of Line. (What movie is that from?)
Dad
Har! Great post, Drew. It would seem that Matt and myself are among the very least annoying couple of the entire Foster bunch, news that I find both validating and hard to believe at the same time.
Although Matt would undoubtedly tell you that I am quite annoying in my own right, especially when I "pick at him" (i.e., attempt to make adjustments to his appearance when the situation calls for it, which is often), I would argue that my husband ranks higher in the annoying scale than you're giving him credit for.
Especially when he insists on singing out loud whatever horrible, irritating old song that's going through his head (or mine, if I make the mistake of telling him about it). And he won't just sing a little bit of said song, oh no -- he'll run out the entire song, each and every verse, and at the top of his lungs. My screams of protest generally only seem to encourage him in this endeavor.
Remind me not to get Don McClean's "American Pie" stuck in my head any time soon...ugh, shiver me timbers!
This is great. Although I think you, Guzy, should be above me on the list, I can't really argue about the rest. I'm flattered that you find my outbursts justified and well-supported. Since you appreciate my humble efforts so much, I'll be sure to enlighten you in particular even with my opinions in the future.
This is for everybody: after she posted, I informed Wendi that American Pie is a Foster family standard and she had made a grave mistake by mentioning it. But, upon further reflection, I think everyone will think twice before launching into that number from now on. I'm glad she mentioned how much she hates that song, because I do to. A faux-literary, treacly, pretentious and densely opaque sojurn through 1970s cloying singer-songwriting, if you ask us. You have been warned. Oh sorry, I'm outbursting again.
Finally -- Dad. Dad. Dad. Using the word "poppycock" in any way, shape or form whatsoever automatically vaults you to the top of the list.
Mickey: as potential alternatives / substitutes for the euphemism "poppycock" , I would recommend the following:
"malarkey", "hooey", "blarney", "baloney", "garbage", or that great old standard from Colonel Potter on M.A.S.H. -- "horsehockey"!
:-D
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